Ø Smoking of a cigarette won`t send you to hell. It just makes you smell like you have been there.
Ø A Bumper Sticker on a married Man`s Car:
Do not disturb...
Ø Judge: Why did u shoot your wife instead of shooting her lover?
Man: Your honor, it`s easier to shoot a woman once, than shooting one man every week.
Ø Santa: My wife died yesterday. I`m trying to cry but tears are not come out, what to do?
Banta: No Problem. Just imagine she came back.
Ø A kiss is called humanity if its on cheek, love if on lips, passion if on breast, humor if on navel, sex if on vagina and called bravery if its on ass hole.
Ø Text messaging is like a blowjob off an amateur prostitute; short...sweet and always cheap!
Ø UR msgs r like a Girl's Period, comes once a month for 3-4days & disappears. But My msgs r like a Man's Sperms that come Daily or Twice a Day. So msg like a Man.
Ø Little boy kills a butterfly, Dad-no butter for you, Boy kills a honeybee Dad-no honey for you! Mum kills a cockroach, boy turns to Dad and says now what
Ø Failure is not when ur girlfriend leaves you... It's only when u leave her a virgin!
Ø What is pure Hindi name of Condom??
Rubber ki Chiknai yukt Prajanan virodhak mardana Ling ki topi.
Ø A Baby was born laughing with its fist closed. Puzzled, the doctor unfolded it's tiny finger and found a birth control pill.
Ø `I trust you` is a better compliment than `I love you` because you may not always trust the person you love but you can always love the person you trust.
Ø I Looked at my back, I thought I saw u. I Listened eagerly bcoz i thought I heard you, but NO you were not there. This made me realized only 1 thing. I miss you so much!
Ø Commerce professor asks student: What is the most important source of finance for starting business?
Student: Father in law.
Ø Men want three qualities in wives: Economist in the kitchen, artist at home and devil in the bed. But they get an artist in kitchen, a devil at home and an economist in Bed.
Ø Every time I miss you, a star falls. So if you ever look up at the sky and the stars are gone, it`s because you made me miss you too much!
Ø Some people were born with talents. They can do beautiful things with their skills, knowledge and technology. But no one is as talented as you. You just come near, and there is already beauty.
Ø If loving you is wrong, then I don't wanna be right. My love for you is strong and brighter then any light. The way we must go is long, but we'll win every fight.
Ø This is the telephone terrorist team. While receiving this message a virus will be activated. This virus should have infected your mobile by now. Your mobile will be disabled, unless you are ugly.
Ø You are someone who understands what it means to be a friend and I appreciate that…Just as I appreciate you. That’s why with every passing day I’m more and more thankful for u and for the wonderful Friendship. You are always so willing to share.
Ø Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.
Ø You are the parts of being mine and i hope i always be a parts of you to bring to your life a plenty of happiness.
Ø You brought a new meaning to my simple life,n u made it beautiful with ur undesirable love... u make me smile even when ur not around.. u make me feel loved when i most miss u. whatever it is u can make me whole again.
Ø Someone asked me for how long i will like u...i remained silent b'coz i didn't know, which one is longer?-"Always" or "Forever".
Ø Everyone wants 2 be the sun dat lights up your life. But I'd rather be ur moon, so I can shine on u during your darkest hour when your sun isn't around.